When a relationship goes bad and ends it can throw up all sorts of negative emotions that can lead to behaviour that you would not normally ever consider doing! Below are the 5 most common mistakes people make when trying to get their ex back and the reasons why making these 5 get my ex back mistakes simply drive your ex even further away!
1. Are you calling your ex over and over and begging them to take you back? This one is guaranteed to really push the button of rejection in your ex's heart. Have you ever been annoyed by a salesperson continually calling you? Do you remember how much those calls annoyed you? In that case why do you think your ex is going to feel any different? By continually calling your ex you are simply reinforcing in their mind that their decision to leave was the right one. As far as your ex is concerned you must have nothing else going on in your life if all you can do is call them all day! This kind of behaviour comes across as needy and nobody wants a needy person in their life. Instead find something else to occupy your mind, join a gym, take up knitting or train to be an astronaut! It doesn't matter what you do as long as you don't pick up the phone! Give your ex time to miss you and you never know...they might be calling you!
2. Do you appear like a shadow everywhere you know your ex is going to be? In the same bar, club, or even outside their workplace? Hoping that some miracle will take place and your ex will suddenly fall into your arms? This my friend is very near to stalking and is not a smart idea! Right now your ex needs time alone to get over the hurt of her broken relationship with you! Yeah that's right...your ex might be hurting and confused as well! Give them a little space to heal and they might just come looking for you!
3. Spending a fortune on flowers and sending them letters or leaving little notes for them with their friends? Or even worse at their workplace? Tell me something? Did you do the same when you were together? No? Then why do you think this is going to work now? This is a time for you to get your act together and show your ex that you can be a mature future partner for them not a moony sentimentalist who won't give them a moment's peace! As in number 1 spend your money on getting fit or learning a new skill. Give your ex a reason to send flowers to you!
4. Constantly reminding your ex of the promises they made to you when you were together? Good idea...if all else fails try blackmail! That's sure to work! You have never kept all your promises so why expect your ex to? We all make promises that we fully intend to keep at the time we make them but due to changing circumstances those promises are forgotten about. Don't try and send your ex on a guilt trip...that will only succeed in making them hate you more and go on a very long trip to get away from you! Make yourself a promise to become a better person and then let your ex see the person you have become. That might just be enough to remind them of the promises they made to you!
5. And now the worst mistake of all! Trying to use logic to get your ex back. Are you trying to persuade your ex that going back with you is the sensible thing to do? Trying to sell yourself to them by pointing out all your good points? Explaining why you would be good for them? Trying to convince them by pure logic why you belong together? This just will not work. Why? Because relationship breakups are caused by emotions and those confused and hurt emotions do not stop when the relationship is over. Trying to deal with emotions by using logic is like trying to turn the tide back with a magic wand! You are simply going to get swamped! Give your ex time to heal their emotions and much more importantly take the time to heal your own!
Once you have got yourself under control then you can approach your ex as a friend. And who knows? Once they see the mature and level headed person you have become that spark of romance may flare into life again!
